


Revolutionary SJW Utena

by orphan_account



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers, Shoujo Kakumei Utena | Revolutionary Girl Utena, ジョジョの奇妙な冒険 | JoJo no Kimyou na Bouken | JoJo's Bizarre Adventure
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crossover, Female MRA's also exist too FYI, Gen, MRA's are much more nicer than you think, R.I.P. Real Feminism 1848-The last millisecond of December 31th of the year 2009
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-20
Updated: 2017-08-20
Packaged: 2018-12-17 13:29:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11852568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: You'll never see politics the same way again.





	Revolutionary SJW Utena

**Author's Note:**

> P.D. I never watched those anime, i'm too hipster for that for now, and I wrote this with my only knowledge about them.

<https://youtu.be/HL25C0H9vVw> 

 

 

_Let's go on living xour sexualities heroically, with pride._

_(Only there's 71 genders)_

_And even if the two of qus should be Oppressed,_

_(Stay away from them)_

_Take xy Feminism._

_In the sunlit campus, hand in hand,_

_qe protested there, and yelled each other with the words:_

_"Neither of xus will ever love cis men again."_

_(Problematic)_

_I'll take a bit of xy Genderqueer, and cram it inside xy identity_

_the smile xi have in this Tumblr post of xus making justice._

_(#FUCKYEAHREVOLUTION)_

_Though xi Questioning, Microaggressed, and get Triggered,_

_and Patriarchy approaches now, frantically,_

_What xi want is to find xy Safe space in life and to be Privileged,_  
_taking who I've Policing up until today..._

_...and heroically beating the scum down until he's dead,_

_like the snowflakes whirling in freedom._

_But even if the two of qus should be Mansplained,_

_Xi will liberalize xhe world._

 

* * *

 

 

"Once upon a time, there was a state in the United States of America called: Virginia. A very nice place in the country with many rural areas and green hills showcasing the beauty of nature. But also, peaceful urban areas like cities such as Charlottesvi—" The Narrator gets hit by a club.  

"OUCH! WHY DID YOU HIT ME!" The Narrator yelled. 

"DIE YOU FUCKING ANTIFA BLACK LIVES MATTER SUPPORTER!" The alt-righter protester yelled. 

"PLEASE! SOMEBODY HELP ME—" The Narrator dies after gets beaten with a club multiple times. 

 

"DIE CIS SCUM!" Utena yells while counterprotesting. 

"So, Anthy, how zou go with killing all the White supremacists?" Utena said. 

"Why you do this to me, why." Anthy says with a monotone voice. 

 

Utena strangles the neck of Anthy and Anthy fears Utena. 

 

"Remember, _zou_ are a Black-to-Black-Arabian Trans*biethnic and **_zou_** , sexually identify as a Trans*binarykin of Omnilesbianheterophobiasexual orientati—" Utena gets hit by a car. 

 

Someone gets out the car. 

 

"WHO'S INVADING xY SAFE SPACE!" Utena yelled to the person who got out of the car. 

 

"Hello? Do you know where is the nearest Neckbeard apparel store?" Jotaro said with a open bag of Doritos on his hand. 

 

"Are... Are you a MEN'S RIGHTS ACTIVIST?!" Utena yells. 

 

"Argh! This is like the 6th Social Justice Warrior I've run into today!"Jotaro says. 

 

 

"STAY AWAY FROM XE AND STOP CULTURALLY APPROPRIATING THE MEXICANS!" Utena yells. 

 

ゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴ

 "GO BACK TO TUMBLR AND STOP SHOVING YOUR SO CALLED "SOCIAL JUSTICE" EVERYWHERE! 

ゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴ

 

"YOU MISOGYNIST!" Utena yelled. 

 

**ゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴ**

"YOU MISANDRIST!" Jotaro yelled. 

**ゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴ**

 

"Grant xethe power to bring the world revolut—" Utena gets hit by a tank missile and it explodes. 

 

 

 <http://www.nsfwyoutube.com/watch?v=dUKfbgp4p-4>

 

And of sudden, a tank called "AllejudenkommenausderhölleundwondershowzenistgenialLXXXVIII" arrives and all the people inside it comes out. 

 

"Holocauuust~!" Italy says. 

 

"YOU WHITE STRAIGHT CIS MALE CULTURAL APPROPRIATING ALT-RIGHTER NAZIS!" Utena yelled. 

 

"GET THE FICKEN AWAY, YOU FUCKING DYKE!" Germany yelled from his mobile throne while being held by his fellow nazi soldiers. 

 

"NO, _YOU_ AND _YOUR_ PRIVILEGED PATRIARCHY GO AWAY!" Utena yells.

 

"Is it not true, Anthy?" Utena says.

 

"HELP! A—NAZI IS TRYING—TO KILL—me..." Anthy gets beaten many times with a pipe by Russia.    

 

"Hey, Germaniya! I just found a Dyke Cyka Blyat and I found her ID Card on the ground!" Russia says. 

 

Germany reads the ID card. 

 

"The dyke was a guy?! Oh, who cares, more inferiors to the oven" Germany says. 

 

"DID YOU JUST TRIGGER ZER?!"  Utena yells. 

 

"Argh, mein Gott not again" Germany says. 

 

Utena proceeds to rant about (Insert anti-White straight cis male arguments here) 

 

"Hey, so... anyone wants to go at my tea party this weekend?" England says. 

 

"Allez-vous avoir des jambes de grenouilles pour la fête?" "我们可以用烟花炸毁蒙古人吗？" "今週末は48時間ノーストップでエロアニメを見たいと思っていました。" France, China and Japan respectively responded at the same time. 

 

"SCHLIESSEN SIE JESUS FICKEN CHRISTUS!" Germany yelled. 

 

Utena _finally_ shuts up. 

 

"You know what, let's get out of here!" Germany said.  

 

"Hey you! The guy with the fedora! do you want to come with us?" Germany said. 

 

"I was so annoyed by those Social Justice Warriors ever since a couple years ago. So yes, I'm coming with us" Jotaro responded. 

 

All the good straight cis males enter to the AllejudenkommenausderhölleundwondershowzenistgenialLXXXVIII tank and leave. 

 

"YEAH! GO AWAY YOU CIS SCUMS!" Utena yells. 

 

"Okay, let's do this. Italy! Press the Final Solution button!" Germany says. 

 

"Sì il mio Führer Doitsu~!" Italy responds. 

 

Italy presses the button. 

 

Meanwhile, in the sky, an Attack Helicopter drops a Baseball cap-shaped nuclear bomb with "Make America Great Again" written on it on Charlottesville, Virginia. 

 

"Oh, where xy phone? Xi wonder what Xi got on xy Tumblr feed" Utena said. 

 

"GOD BLESS AMERICAAAAA!" America yells while wearing a Ku Kux Klan outfit on top of the nuclear bomb and falling to 1776 feet in height.. 

 

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM. 

 

* * *

 

<https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHn-EnLi_rU>

_Hey, hey Papa!_

_Give me Eintopf!_

_Hey, hey Mama!_

_Hey, hey Mama!_

_We put more Jews to the concentration camps,_

_To protect our Blood and soil!_

_Draw a triangle, that's the inferior race_

_Draw a triangle, that's the inferior race_

_Draw a triangle, that's the inferior race_

_We are the Alt-right!_

_Ah, with the mass graves, a new order can be seen_

_With our honor, let's make the Nazi salute!  Alt-right!_

* * *

 

UTENA THOMPSON

1994-2017

SHE JUST WANTED TO ERADICATE ALL THE MEN

 

ANTHONY WILLSON

1995-2017

HE DREAMED TO BE A BOSTON STREET GANG LEADER NIGGA

**Author's Note:**

> Pls don't kill me I'm just a White straight cis girl.


End file.
